Virtual Granny

Star Letter for New Idea Magazine 18.10.97

VIRTUAL GRANNY

I never expected to become a grandmother when my daughter

was only 11 years old, but here I am – a virtual grandmother.

Just as I was getting my head above water at home, once again

I’m tied to the kitchen sink, this time minding the virtual pet, in

our case, a chicken named Tweet.

The school in its wisdom (and who could blame them), banned

them under pain of confiscation, so I imagine there’s 199 other

women from my daughter’s school in the same boat as me!

My protests were matched with “but Tweet will die while I am

at school if he is not cared for”. “All you have to do is:



• Be there when he wakes up.

•  Feed him rice, water and lollies.

•  Play with him.

•  Put his hat on if the sun comes out.

•  Clean up his mess.

•  Answer his call when Tweet rings his bell.

•  And wait for it – give him education when he asks for it!

Here I am at 8am sitting at the kitchen table wondering if it’s

safe to go shopping before he wakes, or will I come home and

find we have had a death in the family!

I suppose the good part is, I will never be redundant in this

family – a mother and virtual grandmother’s work is never

done!